Dating a single mother of two
Do make her a mixed CD and enjoy watching Netflix together after the kiddos hit the hay. Throw everything you know about scheduling out the window.
But one day I realized that even though I'd tried to convince myself I could separate the two identities, it's impossible; like winter and spring, they can't exist without each other.
At the end of the day they're both me, one is just a little bit cleaner and has pruned more recently than November.
It's probably best you move along if either of you wants something long-term. You might have a really fun time with your nephew at Christmas, but this isn't the same as cleaning up vomit at 3 a.m. At least not until you're all functioning as a family unit, which takes time, honesty, and patience, and possibly some therapy. You're at the mercy of custody agreements, parent-teacher conferences, skinned knees, stuffy noses, and — buy her wine for this one — lice. Throw everything you know about Sunday Funday out the window. Handling what life serves is her modus operandi — she's been handling it since before you came along, and she's prepared to handle it if you leave. Pamper her because you admire her Terminator strength to always keep going.
Ask about what she loves about being a mom, ask about what her kids' interests are, admit that you've never seen . Liking her kids isn't the same as raising her kids. Until the mini people are old enough to get their own cereal and turn on the cartoons, there's no such thing as sleeping in. Be supportive if she complains about him, but whatever you do, don't talk badly about him in front of the kids (it's actually included in many custody agreements; don't make a sticky situation stickier). She can't just see how the night goes and stay out as long as she might want. Goldfish crackers and Band-aids are never far away. Hand sanitizer, Chapstick, a small dinosaur, some crayons, or a flashlight?